Research
findings support the idea that the most complete love has a number of
components. Robert Sternberg asked subjects to describe their relationships
with lovers, parents, siblings, and friends. Analysis of the results revealed
three components of close relationships: intimacy, passion, and
decision/commitment to maintain the relationships.
o
Intimacy
involves sharing feelings and providing emotional support. It usually involves
high levels of self-disclosure through the sharing of personal onformation not
ordinarily revealed because of risk involved. Intimacy gradually increases as
the relationship matures and deepens.
o
The
passsion component refers to sexuality, attraction, and romance in a
relationship.
o
The
decision/commitment component involves both short- and long-term factors. The
short-term factor is the decision, made consciously and unconsciously, to love
another person. The long-term factor is the commitment to maintain the love.
Sometimes people fall in love but do nothing afterward to maintain it.
Sternberg and Barnes described eight different combinations of these three components of love:
1.
Absence
of intimacy, passion, and commitment: no love
2.
Intimacy
only: liking (but no passion or commitment)
3.
Passion
only: infatuation (but little intimacy or commitment)
4.
Decision/commitment
only: empty love (with no passion or intimacy)
5.
Intimacy
and passion: romantic love (no commitment)
6.
Intimacy
and commitment: compationate love (without passion)
7.
Passion
and commitment: fatuous love (foolish love, without real intimacy)
8.
Intimacy,
passion, and commitment: consummate love (the most complete love)
So, which is your kind of love? You have no love? Or, you have the most complete love?
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